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Socialize your puppy” is one of the most common pieces of advice you get, so that your puppy will become friendly with all types of people and will not be aggressive towards other dogs. I guess that means the more my dog interacts with other people and dogs, the friendlier he will become, right? Wrong! How can we put our puppies in a situation without the necessary skills they need to cope? Far too often I hear of a dog that is afraid of a certain type of dog because of one bad experience they had. Perhaps the enthusiastic puppy was allowed to go bounding up to an older dog that may not enjoy being pestered by an exuberant, playful puppy. Or a timid puppy is chased down by an overexcited, hyper dog with good intentions to play but no polite manners.
Puppy socialization should only take place after a good foundation has been laid. One that includes impulse control, calmness, focus on you rather than on the environment. This is going to set your puppy up for calm, confident, well-mannered social interactions.
What does socialization really look like anyway?
According to the Oxford dictionary, the definition of socialization is the process of learning to behave in a way that is acceptable to society. I hoped that my dog would become a friendly and well-mannered dog towards all people and other dogs too. This was not always what it looked like when my dog and I went for a walk at the park. As a puppy, my dog greeted everyone that couldn’t resist his cuteness. He had puppy friends come over for playdates and once he was up to date on all his puppy vaccinations, we visited the occasional dog park (though I am not a fan of dog parks). But he needed to socialize, right?
Fast forward several months, and to my surprise, I had an overexcited dog every time visitors came over or we passed someone on a trail. He thought that every person had to be greeted very enthusiastically and he expected to play with every other dog he saw. And if the dog was at a distance, he would pull on the leash and often bark until he reached his target, because after all, socializing was the right thing to do.
Think about the last time you went to the grocery store. Did you walk up to every other person at the store and get really close to them, greet them exuberantly, shake their hand and inspect their shopping basket? I’m guessing not. That would be kind of awkward.
The truth is, socialization doesn’t involve much physical contact with strangers or their dogs. A well-mannered and friendly dog should wait calmly with his owner, ignoring those around him until given permission to engage in a relaxed greeting. A calm and relaxed dog is far more likely to be friendly towards another dog compared to a dog whose energy and stress levels are high.
I hope this gives you a new angle on dog socialization. If you want to learn more about how to teach your dog better social skills, you can achieve that right here.
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